Monthly Archives: June 2012

Laundry

Laundry

I found this on a blog (honesttoddler.wordpress.com) the other day and it made me laugh out loud.  This is the scene at our house all too often!

How to do Laundry – from a toddler’s perspective

Step 1: Pack clothes into the washer as tightly as possible. Assess your work and remove 4-5 items that you’ve never liked. Don’t bother separating by tint as that formality has been abandoned.

Step 2: Pour in either too much liquid/powder detergent or a small, tightly wrapped package of candy.

Step 3: Press 2-3 buttons. Wait for ocean sounds.

Step 4: 24 hours later, open the washer. Become visibly overwhelmed by the smell of sewer. Shed a few bitter tears. Pull out a sock and press it to your nose. Say “Again?” in a shaky voice.

Step 5: Put the damp, slightly stiff clothes in the dryer with twelve fabric softener sheets.

Step 6: 48 hours later, open the dryer. Take out a tank top and wear it. Walk around all day saying, “Something in here smells terrible.”

Step 7: Take clothes from the dryer. Place them in the washer with the special soap or packet of candy. Press buttons. Wait for the ocean’s song.

Step 8: Three days later, return. Open the washer and carefully remove the tadpole and bullfrog community that has taken up residence. Release them into the wild or destroy them in the garbage disposal, whichever pleases you more.

Step 9: Add more soap or candy, this time in startling amounts. Add in six tablespoons of baking powder, two cups of vinegar and a cup of diluted bleach (borrow it from a neighbor who isn’t as eco-conscious as you are.)

Step 10: Press buttons and wait for water. Don’t move for 35 minutes.

Step 11: Ignore the basic emotional needs of the toddler you claim to love. :(

Step 12: Open the washer. Sniff and smile.

Step 13. Open the dryer. Notice the fitted sheet and towel sitting in it. Sigh. Remove them.

Step 14: Place clothes in dryer. Press buttons.

Step 15: 40 minutes later, open dryer. Take out the clothes you need for the day. Press “tumble” every 2-3 hours over the next three weeks to keep clothes wrinkle free until a new set of clothes needs washing.

Congratulations! You have completed your first load of laundry. At this time parents typically reward themselves with 6 hours of pinterest and a large plastic cup of wine but feel free to celebrate in a way that speaks to your unique spirit.

***If this process seems too overwhelming, simply repeat the phrase,”I have nothing to wear,” over and over while making preparations for a trip to Target.

10 Random Things

10 Random Things

A few weeks ago, my friend Brittnie tagged me to list 10 Random Things About Me.  Well…that was the last week of school and I was so busy with wrapping up the school year and making preliminary plans for next year that I completely forgot about the tag.  Then school ended, we left for Abilene, and I never got around to doing it…Until now…

1.  I think my biggest pet peeve is clutter.  I cannot stand stuff around the house (or my classroom, car, etc…) being out of place.  Piles of stuff on the counter, table, or desk is completely unnecessary.  And annoying.

2.  I HATE wearing makeup.  That might be my favorite part of summer, not having to wear makeup.

3.  If I had enough storage, I would have a different set of dishes for every day of the week, in addition to Christmas dishes.  I LOVE dishes.

4.  I’ve always wanted to be a secretary.  If only it paid a respectable salary…like teaching…HAHA!

5.  I really want to be one of those people who loves to exercise…I just can’t find the motivation.

6.  I’m REALLY picky about food.  Not so much the food itself, but how its cooked, what its seasoned with, etc…  Eating food other people have cooked is really hard for me.  And I love salt.  Even if the food is perfectly seasoned, I still add salt.  No offense to the cook…I just like salt…alot.

7.  I LOVE hurricanes.  I know, I know…they cause death and destruction to so many, but I absolutely love to see the power of the storms.

8.  I would prefer to spend every single day in a tshirt and shorts or capri’s and flip flops (with no makeup).  I just don’t see the need to dress up all the time.

9.  I’m so excited to (eventually) add to our family.  Adding Parker to our family has been such a wonderful experience and I can’t wait to have more children.  (But we do plan on waiting a couple of years.)

10.  I would love to live out in the country, in a big huge house, on lots of land, have a vacation home in the mountains, and a cabin at the beach.  Maybe one day, maybe.